“I was a single mother to a special child.”
“I had an arranged marriage at 29 and within 2 years, I was expecting. I left my job as an investment banker; my husband’s family expected me to be a homemaker and I eventually gave in. I was excited for the next phase of my life.
When I gave birth to Shivansh, I looked at him and felt love like I’d never felt before. But within a few hours, he was shifted to the NICU. Within 48 hours I was told by the doctor that Shivansh’s hips were dislocated. I was shattered!
Shivansh was unable to suck or swallow and had to be fed with a tube–he was in the NICU for 50 days! And when he was 4 months old, I got the worst news of my life–’Shivansh has a severe congenital muscular disorder and would always be a dependent child.’
My husband's family blamed me saying, ‘Your genes caused this.’ My husband was silent; it was as if he agreed with them. We didn’t speak to each other at home for months after. His silence spoke a thousand words so one day, I just left with Shivansh and came back home to my family.
I was a single mother to a special child. My family took me back with open arms. Dad reassured me, ‘I’m with you, beta.’
My days with Shivansh would begin at 3 am–his condition would wake him up. I had to learn to feed him from a g tube which was heartbreaking. His seizures were the worst–once, I thought I was losing him when he had a seizure for 10 minutes. He had to be rushed to the ICU, but my baby bounced back; he’s a fighter!
So I wanted to do everything I could for him– finally, I found a job where I could work from home! So now, I wake up at 3am with Shivansh, feed him, bathe him and put him to sleep by 10am after which I start work! Through the day, I juggle work calls and attend to him, but I wouldn’t have it any way–he’s taught me to be strong for the both of us.
Yes, Shivansh will never walk, talk or make friends; it kills me to realize that; but he always has me. As far fetched as it sounds, my only wish is that one day he’ll call me ‘mom!’ And until then I’m going to keep singing him his favorite nursery rhymes which make him smile so wide and make my heart melt! He’s the best thing that happened to me and I’ll continue to choose him every day of my life.”
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